Still Alive and Well

Huh?

I was thinking about my next blog post and realized one of the reasons I haven’t been writing. When things are going well, I tend to just smile to myself and enjoy it. That tends to leave only the “bad” stories to write about. However, with the proliferation of social media as well as everyone on the internet (except my mom. Whew!), nearly everyone is able to know about what I write. I would not name names, but a person could probably figure out that I was writing about them.

There is also the issue that someone might interpret what I wrote as an attitude they didn’t want to deal with as a musician or bandleader. While I understand that, I must say that I would never cop an attitude “at work,” with a band leader or member, audience member, nor anyone else, unless maybe I was pushed to an extreme. More than likely, I’d continue to do my job, finish the gig, and move on, even if that meant not accepting another gig in the same situation. To me, the blog is a place to tell stories, perhaps to vent, but also to laugh at myself and the situation. In real life, I make every effort to deal with any issues professionally.

I have no problem with the truth, but it’s not my goal with my posts to offend anyone. I think if a mature person has an issue with someone, they keep it to themselves or deal with it properly. That’s what I aspire to. I’m not trying to call anyone out here. Instead I’m telling a story, thinking through what happened, and maybe looking for a little sympathy to know I’m not crazy. (I mean, not crazy for thinking whatever I do about the situation. I know the general sense is a different matter entirely.)

Perhaps I should write about the “good” things or more general things. I didn’t mean for all my blog posts to be bitchy, honest I didn’t.

To extend this post beyond all reasonable length, here are some more general things going on.

I’ve had a few nibbles from some bands, but nothing has panned out. One was particularly interesting because it differed from some of the other bands and covered material by one of my favorite bands.

At the moment, I’m not really bothered by it though. I’ve spent the last few months primarily focused on honing my craft. I’d like to first get to a point where I can feel a bit more comfortable jumping into bands and playing more of what I hear in my head. I know that I have to balance this with the fact that any musician worth listening to (and I hope to be one of these) is never happy with their playing. I cannot let that prevent me from getting out there and playing. I’d be moving the goal posts on myself and that would be chicken of me.

The focus on honing my craft has been tough at times. I’ve been describing it as like taking steps up a big hill. I can look back and say, “well, I guess I’ve made progress,” but the small increments don’t always feel like progress. I know from my own experience as well as from what others have told me that this is typical. You work and work at it, and eventually, bam, it all hits and comes together and works. To continue the hill metaphor, you keep going up the hill, you wonder about your progress, then you come around a bend where suddenly there’s this gorgeous view and you realize how high up you are.

Then you look back up the trail and see there’s much more hill to climb.

Walk On.

Posted 2010 08 22 at 1:52 PM

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